Frequently Asked Questions

• How do I know if I/my partner has a Fearful Avoidant Attachment style?

  People with fearful avoidant attachment styles develop a number of fears and behaviors that affect their adult relationships, particularly their romantic relationships. Fearful avoidant attachments are always on high alert, looking for signs that the person/people they love might leave them or betray them at any time. When feeling dissatisfied in their relationships, they struggle with intense feelings of guilt. People with fearful avoidant attachment tend to deal with feelings of anger and resentment when they find themselves giving too much and not having the same effort returned to them. A fearful avoidant person often also typically suffers from low self esteem and a negative view of themselves. People with a fearful avoidant attachment may be very confusing to others in their interpersonal relationships and especially in their romantic relationships, because they regularly come close, seeking intimacy, but then are equally as quick to pull away, seeking space.

• How does an insecure attachment style develop?

  According to attachment theory, attachment styles develop in people from a very young age, depending on the emotional situations and experiences a child has with their primary caregivers in their early childhood. A person may grow up to have one of the four attachment styles: a fearful avoidant attachment, anxious preoccupied attachment, dismissive avoidant attachment, or secure attachment. The adult attachment styles are thus a direct reflection of childhood trauma (or lack thereof). The theory of attachment styles goes deeper and looks at how the specific belief patterns and behaviors impact a person's adult attachment style. A fearful avoidant attachment style (also known as disorganized attachment style) is one of the three insecure attachment styles according to attachment theory. If someone grows up with a fearful avoidant adult attachment, it's because they likely grew up in an environment where they experienced inconsistent emotional support or where there was a lot of polarity in the home. They might have had a strong emotional connection with one of their parents, but a lot of avoidance from the other. Another thing that causes fearful avoidant attachment is when both parents are supportive, but at infrequent times. When this happens, the fearful avoidant child never really knows what to expect. If a child's caregiver was very hot and cold with the young child, they probably began to understand that their love was conditional — based on them performing well or behaving a certain way. They also most probably grew up to fear rejection.

• Can I transform an insecure attachment style, such as fearful avoidant/disorganized attachment style, and start to experience secure relationships?

  Yes! You can transform all insecure attachment styles into secure attachment. Even if you identify with a disorganized attachment style, and fear closeness in intimate relationships, it is fully in your power to turn it around – and start to attract romantic partners with behavior patterns that are in alignment with love and harmony.

• How will taking this course help me transition from a fearful avoidant attachment style to a secure attachment style?

  If you identify as a fearful avoidant person, this course will help you take the steps you need to understand and fix fearful avoidant attachment. It will equip you to tackle unresolved trauma so that you can start to feel safe, trust others, and have healthy relationships. You will learn how to reprogram your betrayal wounds and communicate better when you need more space or more connection. In addition, you’ll learn to self-soothe when you're experiencing feelings of anger or resentment, improve your low self esteem, and avoid feeling like you're on high alert all the time. This course will ultimately equip you with everything you need to know to understand your attachment style better and build stronger personal relationships as someone with a fearful attachment.

• How will the Fearful Avoidant Reprogramming Course help me if I am the partner of someone with a Fearful Avoidant Attachment style?

  If fearful avoidant is your partner's attachment style, then completing this course will also be extremely valuable for teaching you the fundamentals of attachment theory and how it affects your romantic relationship. It will help you understand how fearful avoidant individuals think and feel in their close relationships. By taking the course, you will learn how to analyze your partner's behavioral patterns to gauge when they are experiencing negative emotions, when they seek intimacy, or when they need their space. By taking this course, you will learn how to communicate better with your loved one and be sure you're meeting your partner's needs much more effectively.

• I’m worried that I won’t be able to dedicate enough time to completing the course.

  The Reprogramming for Fearful Avoidant Attachment Style Course is an online and self-paced program you can complete at your own pace and on your own schedule. How you work through it is totally up to you. Feel free to binge it on an empty weekend or complete as little as 10 minutes a day whenever you can. There are no coursework deadlines for you to worry about so you can even take a few weeks break when life gets busy – then pick up right where you left off!

• Can I cancel the course if I don’t like it?

  Absolutely. If you feel that the Reprogramming for Fearful Avoidant Attachment Course is not for you, you can cancel your membership at any time – no questions asked. We have a very high success rate of students developing into secure attachment styles and feeling more fulfilled in all areas of their lives after enrolling in our courses and programs. We're confident that you'll have the same success. But if for whatever reason it no longer feels like the right fit or time for you, you can cancel any time.